REALLY?!

I'm all about enjoying people trying to be funny (love it when people actually are funny)...but, this cartoon in the NY Post is ridiculous! I mean...if Jessica Simpson is "fat" then goood gaaaaaa...what in the world?!! She's a SIZE 2!! And, she proably looks like a teeny lil thing in person. If anything, it shows she's normal. (I mean, since she might've gained a pound) I don't feel one way or another about her, but, this cartoon is so stupid. To me anyway.

Waving=Not Cool

A man from Cleveland Ohio, John Coleman is being kicked out of his skirt wearing band (I made that up, I'm assuming) for waving to the President during the parade at the Inauguration. Why is it a crime to wave again? Well, the band leader says that they went over the military protocal a million times before the parade, and no waving is involved in the military. Or something like that. The prez made eye contact and waved...so, firefighter John waved back. Uh oh. You're suspended! Out the band for 6 months. Until John resigned because of all the publicity yesterday. It's okay John, I wouldn't want to be friends with people who judge you for waving either; and make you wear a small hat.

Tom Mercedes

Tom Ford, Gucci's (and YSL's) once head designer extraordinaire just put some new jeans on the market. You can buy them for $990 bucks!!! HUH?! I mean, do they massage my butt and make me lunch every day? Apparently, they are lined with silk and have a gold zipper. Woop di doo...I might spend $990 if they took 15 pounds off, other than that, no thanks Tom.

SAG Awards

The SAGS were last night. Let's just recap some of the fashion. Kate, perfection. (duh) Eva Longoria...wtf? She looks like a Vegas Flamenco Dancer. Angelina...you look gorg...I love her dress, but, she looks so pissed off all the time. Cheer up, you have babies with Brad Pitt. Not too shabby. (Oh, and Angie, you always wear the same dress...spice it up or something) Christina Appelgate...I love green, but the dress is kinda hideous. And you have too many accessories. Obviously, I know nothing about fashion...it's just personal opinions that I ramble on with. The only "styling" I do is helping Lee pick out his ties in the morning.

It's snowing...

The snow in Utah is INSANO! Huge crazy big flakes...I feel like I'm in a snowglobe. I tried to capture it for you to see. This morning, there was no snow on the ground and this was taken around 2p. Danger! (To be honest, I'm not sure when it started snowing since I didn't get up until late, but...there wasn't any snow late night)

Sad

On this season of the Real Housewives of the OC, I previously mentioned Gretchen's older fiance Jeff whom was sick with Leukemia. Sad. He passed away September 13th 2008. Which, for him means he at least didn't have to see the last few episodes. God Bless.

No 4 year degree required...

Other than your high school diploma. You can do all these well-paying jobs for just graduating high school and then "on the job" training. (This info is from Career Builder) Check it out...some of it was rather interesting...Here are a few...


1) Credit Manager=average salary $83,600

2)Air Traffic Controller=average salary $75,000 (ummmheelllooo...pay them whatever they ask for!!!)

3)Automobile Service Station Manager=average salary $72,000

4)Real Estate Broker=average salary $72,000

5)Web surfer...you can get paid for this?! It says that you analyze and compare web info...what does that mean?? Well, you get paid $71,000 a year for it...

6)Lead Carpenter= average salary $64,000

7)Assembly Supervisor..the description for this is "supervise workers who use power tools" haha...that sounds funny. You get paid 50K.

8)Interior Aircraft Assembly Supervisor-Seems like you'd need more training for this, but whatever...you get paid $53,000

I'm done. I feel uneasy that the person who "assembles" airplanes only gets paid 53K...I want to make sure it stays together, bokay?

Poor Danny Zuko

This is so horrible!!! It's even hard to believe that humans can be so disgusting. Apparently, some idiot, low-life is blackmailing the Travoltas for a million dollars. Why? Because one of the paramedics that was in the ambulance with his dying son, Jett, took a picture with his cell phone and is threatening to release it to the tabloids. Sick sick sick. If the tabloids could be trusted NOT to print it...they could ignore the threats, but, there is always someone that is willing to be that gross. They lost their son. LEAVE THEM ALONE.

And the nominees are...

Oscars announced this morning!

I've seen Slumdog Millionaire (go see it please), Milk, and Tropic Thunder. I'm really going to try and see the rest of the pictures before Oscar time. I'll keep you posted and review them here if anyone cares. I'm not really sure if I want to see Frost/Nixon? I'm a political junkie and this movie seems tiring and a bit boring to me. We'll see. (The trailor with Frank Langella who plays Nixon asking if "he did any fornicating last night?" huh? Also, tricky Dick? I don't think so)

BEST PICTURE

"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button""Frost/Nixon""Milk"The Reader""Slumdog Millionaire"

BEST ACTRESS

Anne Hathaway "Rachel Getting Married"Angelina Jolie, "Changeling" Melissa Leo, "Frozen River", Meryl Streep "Doubt" Kate Winslet (love her, but she already won two Globes...which is usually a predictor of who will win The Oscar), "The Reader"

BEST ACTOR

Frank Langella, "Frost/Nixon" Sean Penn, "Milk" Brad Pitt, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" Mickey Rourke, (I'm somewhat fascinated with Mickey, the comeback and his crazy plastic surgery) "The Wrestler" Richard Jenkins, "The Visitor"

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

Amy Adams "Doubt" Penelope Cruz "Vicky Cristina Barcelona" Viola Davis, "Doubt" Taraji P. Henson, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" Marisa Tomei, "The Wrestler"

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR

Josh Brolin, "Milk" Robert Downey Jr., "Tropic Thunder"Philip Seymour Hoffman, "Doubt" Heath Ledger, "The Dark Knight" Michael Shannon, "Revolutionary Road"

BEST DIRECTOR

Danny Boyle, "Slumdog Millionaire"Stephen Daldry, "The Reader"David Fincher, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"Ron Howard, "Frost/Nixon"Gus Van Sant, "Milk"

Dear Barack...

Mr President,


I know you've only been the leader of the free world for a few hours, but, there are couple things that need immediate attention. I live in Utah, so I need a few things changed here right fast. Please move Trader Joes into the state (so, we need to throw out that law about no wine in grocery stores, etc) I really miss my 2 buck chuck and the freedom of buying a case of it at Costco/SAMS/or TRADER JOES. Also, please allow the gays to have all the rights that straight married people get...if you are opposed to gay marriage then you should totally stay married to Michelle and not marry a dude. If you can't grant them that right as human beings, then I'm starting a petition so that the gays don't have to pay any taxes. It's only fair. Most importantly, please fix our economy. It's in the crapper. I'm so tired of seeing people layed off and CEO's getting bonuses. It's time to restructure, not bail. People need to hold themselves responsible for the decisions they make...not anyone else...let's quit spreading the blame, and do something about it. I'm really excited that you're President. I think you are fantastic. I'm jealous that you get a dog...our apartment won't let us have one because of the wood floors. I know, it's totally lame...

Much love...cara

PS-I'm also glad that you don't drink...you have a lot of work to do and I don't want you hungover in the morning.

Nevermind Eva

Today is so cool. Such a poignant day in American History; I feel so excited that I was able to witness Barack Obama become our President. First, I don't want to be Eva Mendes when I grow up anymore...I'd rather be Michelle Obama. She's divine. She's elegant. She didn't act like she was freezing in that outfit. Good luck Mr. President.

I wish I invented food

Looking at your bank account should be limited to once a week. (at the most) I happen to peek a little to often, and it seems to me I spend most of my money in the FOOD AND BEVERAGE category. How does that even happen? How is there so much food in this world for me to spend a good chunk of money on it? I'm pretty sure I don't need all of the food I consume. This week, I'm going to try to eat just the food in my pantry. Am I the only one that feels I spend spend at the grocery and then two nights later have absolutely nothing left to eat? That is not appropriate I'm pretty sure. If anyone has any self-sustaining tips, I'd love to hear them. While I wait, Lee's going to order us a pizza.

The REAL Housewives, OC

No one can top my new favorite housewives...those crazy chicks in Atlanta. I love those hot messes....thanks Nene. However, I still have to watch the OC because they are trashtastic in their own way. This season there a few new faces. First, Lynn who is obsessed with being young. (Heeelllooo Lynn...you should've stayed out the sun then honey) The worst thing about Lynn is her spoiled brat daughters. Think Laguna Beach. Tragic. The other new "wifey" is Gretchen. Gretchen, oh Gretchen. Her fiance is an older gentelmen (26 years her senior) and filthy rich. She goes on and on about her ring...everything material...blah blah...I can't stand people like that. I have no tolerance. I do feel sorry for her because he has cancer and is very sick. But, ultimately, I find her a complete trashbox. (Even though she did get brownie points for saying she loved Indianapolis) She's a total attention whore. And last week, she hooked up, allegedly, with one of the other housewives sons. I rest my case.

American Idol Crap

Woah...I've been busy for a moment. I have lots to get out now! Let's start with the first week of AI. My girlfriend said it best "how come the new judge looks like she wants to have sex with everybody?" haha. I don't know, but, she does, doesn't she? I'm not sure how I feel about her...indifferent I suppose. Paula looks better than last year (though still crazy, love her), Randy looks the same (less dogs so far, sorry dawwgss), and Simon is workin the man boobs. So far, I love the girl who was named after Stevie Nicks, because well...that's amazing. I don't condone the watching of FOX television, but, I can't help but watch AI.

Volunteering is good for you

I was just looking in my planner (that's right, I'm so old fashioned, pen to paper friends) and noticed I have a "volunteer meeting" next week. Great. I feel so good about myself. I'm saying all this in jest because I'm wondering who I'm volunteering for? Am I volunteering for myself? Or for the organization? Or am I WAY overthinking this? I've been involved in a lot of volunteer activites...and I love doing it...but, I start to feel guilty when I tell people about the actual volunteer work? Shouldn't it be completely selfless? I'm just rambling, but, whatever your motivation is, the end result is a good one. Even if I feel guilty sometimes, it's totally worth it...

Nancy Grace Kills Puppies

I have no proof. But how many of you watch her show because it's so annoyingly addictive? For me, about 10 minutes is all I can take...She is so fixated on a certain topic, as of late, of course it's Caylee Anthony. She says "tot mom" every 5 seconds...has Lenord Padilla on there to scream at him (hilarious, btw...does he ever change clothes?) and doesn't really "debate" at all with anyone! That's my favorite part...she gets so angry! Drink a glass of wine! Play with your babies! (not at the same time) Despite her craziness, at least she is passionate about her job. That's all I could come up with...

SPOILER ALERT! American Idol Fans!

It starts tomorrow night. The phenom known as American Idol. I don't follow it as much as I used to. Back in the day, Anthony and I would perch ourselves directly in front of the TV and sing all the songs better and louder than the contestants. (personal opinion) This year, the tryouts in Utah were in the building our studio is in so we ran into Simon, Ryan, Randy...the new judge...no Paula, tear. (my dress is a little crazy, I know, I've since added a belt after seeing this totally unflattering pic.) And by "ran into" I mean stalked all day and sang loudly outside the audition room. (Notice the KOOLS Simon has...ha) Well, I was the only one screaming lyrics obnoxiously as the camera rolled by and lucky contestants waved their golden tickets. I heard that about 20 contestants get to Hollywood week from Utah...and 2 of them make it in. One of the Finalists is an OSMOND, as in Donnie and Marie family tree. The other, is allegedly David Archuleta's voice teachers kid?!! We'll see...I'll at least watch until my attention span is up...which, could be at least 3 weeks? Stay tuned.

When I grow up...

I'd like to be Eva Mendes. She was STUNNING last night at the Golden Globes. Absolutley beautiful. Other stars who looked glorious were Olivia Wilde, Elizabeth Banks, and Kate Winslet. (Who is the 2nd person I'd like to be in my next life...Kate Winslet...amazing)
Then there are some folks who need to fire their stylist. Jenna Fisher, wtf? I mean...I do like your dress...but not with a ratty ponytail and to an award show, bad, bad. Debra Messing (and Sandy Bullock) what was up with the ruffles cascading from your unmentionables. I don't get that? It forces me to look at your crotch, which makes me uncomfortable. Ricky Gervais and his wife...maybe that's supposed to be a joke? Mmm. And Serena, my Gossip girl...I have no words. Let me help you next time.

Done and done!

I took the spit! In 6-8 weeks I will learn about my genome. So exciting. If exciting means totally crapping myself. Woohoo! (I was trying in this pic to convey how freaked out I am...but, I just look scary)

UPDATE: My spit has reached the lab. I got an email, so, now I just wait...exciting!

I still feel good about myself

So, today is Jan 8th, I'm officially trying to start my New Year resolutions now. 8 days late. I think I've worked out once since 2009 started, no Bikram for weeks! First, I've realized how much meat I actually do eat...it's going to be harder than I thought. (all of a sudden, I'm craving pepperoni pizza and wads of meat?) Secondly, I've added "pray more" to my list. Third, I'm obsessed with having a good butt. (on the list, "get nice ass") Mainly, because I've never had one. My friends that look good in jeans...JEALOUS. (seriously, all of them, I'm green with envy) I was thinking that maybe I should take a picture of my butt (in jeans of course), post it, and then be forced to look at it on the daily. Then I decided that was just wrong.

On a lighter, classier note...

Here is just a fun picture...it always makes me giggle. A lot. That's right ladies...you can look...but he's taken. Nothing like a man in short, shiny pants.

G.G...stop annoying me...

Okay, Gossip Girl: Gripe 1# Why do they all have the same flip cell phone with extremely large font text messages? Was there a special on granny cell phones? (just seems odd that out of all the kiddos there isn't one iPHONE? Puhlease) Grip #2 What is the big deal about ADOPTION?! I get that she lied, blah blah...incest...but, hellllooooo!!! It's okay to do the adoption thing. Although, I'm thinking the real loser in this situation is the kid "given up"...he's totally missed out on so many scandals, a cute gay brother, and a sister with kick ass hair. (see photo)

RIDICULOUS

Utah can be so lame and COMPLETEY non-sensical. The governor is trying to loosen up the laws (like less-alcohol beer, no wine in grocery stores) because tourism is a huge source of revenue and the liquor laws don't help things here. Now, a state senator says he wants to strengthen physical barriers between restaurant bars and patrons to protect children from seeing alcohol. Strengthen? All bars relocate to the bomb shelter! State-wide fridge check! Senate President Michael Waddoups, R-Taylorsville, says pouring drinks in front of kids makes drinking attractive. (See picture above, totally sexy...sign me up) He says he'd like to see a physical barrier blocking the view of alcohol at restaurants and the preparation of drinks or have it all moved into a back room. (see bomb shelter) I mean, I'm sure restaurants are going through a skosh of hardship during the current financial crisis, so, why not kick em while their down? Dear restaurant owner, could you please re-configure your restaurant so children aren't permanently scarred by the glimpse of a Patron bottle? Honestly, I can't say that my parents ever took me to a swinging nightclub or plopped me in my booster seat up at the bar. What about eating a Big Mac in view of my pure, vegan child? Or wearing lots of blue eyeshadow with red lipstick? Or a Hannah Montanna shirt? Oh no, my future kid is totally screwed...

Bus Wreck

If you weren't lucky enough to accidently stumble (ahem, wink wink) upon Rock of Love 3: On the Bus then set your tivo for next Sunday. Can't breathe...laughing...so hard. Within the first 30 minutes there was vomiting, (I'm pretty sure those girls just puke...or barf...or upchuck...) tons of swearing, and catfights galore. It was almost too much...even for me, a self-professed crap television watcher. (I feel that it is justified since I'm also an avid news junkie) Even the porn star and the Penthouse centerfold were appalled during one scene. "Those girls just are behaving so horribly!" says the porn star. Um, okay. Is that where you want to be when Jesus comes back? On the Rock of Love bus? In all seriousness, Bret is really looking for true love. Who is going to be the lucky lady to run her fingers through Mr Michaels blonde golden locks...oh, actually, don't touch his hair, the clip-on extensions will fall out. They are headed to Indianapolis next week! And, there is a classy little gal from Utah on the pink bus. This show is a complete debacle. I love it.

Baby Fever

There are 3 babes on my dad's side of the familly. Some of my dearest friends have lil ones. Cute, lil precious babes. Babies everywhere. Now, for those of you reading this, stop laughing at the image of me being prego...no, wait, it's hilarious. I found myself thinking a few times..."I can't wait to have a baby!" Followed immediately by "ARE YOU INSANE?!! You can't even find your car keys most mornings!!" Whatever. There went the baby fever. Maybe it was the egg nog?

Forget it...if I'm so blessed to get to have a baby, it'll be great when the time comes...in at least 3 years or so...right honey? Are you reading this? For now, I am able to puff my stomach out to look at least 5 months pregnant. SEXY. Just kidding...kinda.

Slumdog Millionaire

This movie is fantastic. I love Indians. I love the music. In fact, sometimes, I wonder if it could be possible if I walked around in a sari 24/7, maybe people would think I was Indian? Probably not...I'm disgustingly white. Ugh. (My love affair started by being friends with the coolest Indians on the planet) Back to the movie...Slumdog Millionaire is a hybrid Americanized Bollywood film. It's exceptional with a seamless storyline, amazing character development, and the visuals of a country I've never been to. The whole vibe of the movie is gripping and raw, yet beautiful. You have to see it...and don't leave until the last credit has rolled or you might miss the dancing at the end. The soundtrack is AMAZINNNGG! No joke, if you are not a fan of Bollywood music you are either dead or an idiot. (I say that with love and kindness, promise) Buy the soundtrack, I guarantee it will lead to many hours of dancing with a huge smile on your face...