Check It OUT!

Holy Huge House! Check out Celine Dion's lavish 20 million dollar estate! So many pools! How do you decide which one to swim in? Celine Dioooonnnn IS HEEERRREE! This crib is on Jupiter Island Florida. Tiger Woods and Alan Jackson are neighbors.

Wow

Pauly D and Vinny soak up the rays in Miami surrounded by these super hot chicks. I mean that literally, they are probably hot. Is Brooke Hogan in there somewhere?

Julia R

Weird pic of Julia with a Barbie. But, here's the real scoop: Julia, the most beautiful woman according to People magazine, is a little pissed. Why? Well, a few reasons. All of them having to do with a Miss Sandy B. First, the story of Sandra's adoption of her baby boy, Louis, bumped Julia off the cover of People. She was promised the cover for being the 'most beautiful.' Second, did you know that Julia was offered the Blind Side role that won Sandra the Oscar? Oops. I don't know though, Julia already has an Oscar. Plus, she was filming Eat, Pray, Love in India with Javier Bardem. Not too shabby. I think I would've rather been in India.

Happy Friday..

It's Friday. And it's raining/snowing here. A late night trip to Vegas may be in order. Oy vey. Get hot already!

I Vant To Look Like That

Ivanka Trump always looks total amaze balls. Give me your bag. Well, your whole ensem, thanks.

Sexy Shoes

Christian Louboutin signing some of his own shoes. Pretty cool for a designer. I read once that Danielle Steele has 600 pairs of the red soled creations.

The Couple

Josh and Diane. In Paris. Swoon.

Jake Gyllenhaal

Gay or Not Gay? Totes Gay. For those of you unfamiliar with Ted Casablanca, he's the original gossip guru that coined the original Blind Vice section in his The Awful Truth column. If you haven't read the years of Blind Vice archives, I'm warning you, it will take an entire weekend to get through them. Did I just admit that? Oh well. Anyway, a notorious 'blind' item he has is Toothy Tile. A closeted hunky Hollywood actor, not married but was frequently with an equally fame whorey beard. They 'broke' up. Oh, and he also has an on and off boyfriend and a baby. Commonly thought to be Jakey G. What do you think?  

Amanda Peet

Had a baby 8 days ago.

I'm Baack!

Pics are cool. All is well. YES.

Adam Lambert

Sounds like Richard Marx. What do you want from meeee? -Richard Marx.

This Is Not Good

Heidi Montag is a mess. Seriously. I watched last night and it hurt a little. What in the world...I know The Hills is full o fakery for a reality show, but, that plastic surgery she has IS REAL. And it hurts to look at her. And her mom is so nice. Heidi, get a grip. Please.

Okay, Oops

I think I'm in trouble for taking pics off other websites. Oops. So, blog production is currently halted. I mean, I can't afford to buy the pics like the sites I 'borrow' them from, right? It's not like a jillion people read this blog. I mean, maybe 100 on a good day. (AND THANK YOU) I've got to find a way around this, stay tuned.

Joy and GLEE

A Britney-inspired episode of Glee? Oh, joy! Has Christmas come early?!!

Does Anyone Care?

I haven't watched The Hills for a minute. Maybe if there was an all day marathon I'd tune in out of boredom. And, if there wasn't anything good on BRAVO. Regardless, I might tivo tonight. Why? Well, some Hilly chicks snort more stuff up their noses (allegedly of course), than my dad with his Afrin spray. Plus, Heidi post-surgery? She's a mess. The Hills and The City all new tonight on MTV.

This Is Not A Joke

There is a website raising money for Stephen Baldwin. A church group/fans set up the website restorestephenbaldwin.com. OMG. It includes testimonials from pastors and devout churchmen. The site claims that Baldwin's income plummeted 70% when he became a born-again Christian and turned down roles with gratuitous sex and violence. Uh, okay. Huh. I guess I didn't realize that Stephen Baldwin was turning down roles left and right. Stephen Baldwin: 007. Stephen Baldwin IS MISSION IMPOSSIBLE. Stephen Baldwin, Gladiator II. I don't think so.

I Just Barfed

And that's definitely not classy. Listen to LuAnn's single. It makes you want to cuss at people, ohhh yeah. Also, not classy. Plus, is this LuAnn or T-Pain? I can't tell...she's auto-tuned within an inch of her life. If garbage could sing, this is what it would sound like. Tardy for the Party sounds like Whitney pre-crack next to this. Here's some advice Countess...it's not too late to turn this into a drag queen anthem. It could be saved.

My Girl

Anna Chlumsky looks so pretty. Weeerrrrrkkkk. Even though it does look like the opening of a Oscar Mayer Weiner Store or something...

Lookin Good

Scar Jo at the premiere of Iron Man 2. Looking GORGEOUS. Love the dress...and the hair. (not her shoes, so, I cropped em out) She's def having a moment for me.

Just because.

How To Make Puppy Chow...A Follow-Up

Puppy Chow is for human consumption only. It has lots of chocolate in it, so, don't give it to your puppies!You need a box of Crispix, bag of chocolate chips, and (reduced fat) peanut butter. (I'll have a Diet Coke with my Big Mac, thanks) Melt the chocolate chips in microwave, stir in peanut butter. Empty half the box of Cripsix in a bowl, stir in chocolate/pb mixture until Crispix is coated with chocolatey goodness. Dump into a paper bag. Repeat with other half of box. Dump all in paper bag, coat with powdered sugar, SHAKE. Dance party until all the Crispix is coated with powdered sugar. I don't really measure anything. Just add chocolate chips and peanut butter and Crispix until it is coated and glorious looking. Refrigerate. Enjoy. Gain 5 lbs. It drove me to run last night at 10pm. Do you think Gwyneth would eat Puppy Chow?

Snooki

Where was Snooki when I needed her? I would've shared my chocolate and peanut butter in exchange from some whipped cream. You know it's rough when you compare yourself to Snooki. Oy. **We've all done this before, right? Right. Only difference is I was in the dark staring into my refrigerator wondering why I had spray can whipped cream in the first place. Big difference**

My Own Behind The Music

I thought this weekend as I was making puppy chow that if someone was in my kitchen to witness my behavior, it would be like...cut scene to my best friend looking straight into the camera saying..."I mean, she'd just dribble the chocolate and peanut butter all over her face...eat it right out of the bowl. (dramatic pause) It was disgusting." For those of you who don't know what puppy chow is it is a crispix-chocolate-peanut butter 'dessert.' I used to make in high school all the time for slumber parties, etc. Apparently, people only know what it is in the midwest. I thought it clever to take the puppy chow to our friends dog, Coco's birthday party. I digress. The point of this post is that I made myself sick. Seriously sick. I was spooning peanut butter and chocolate into my mouth like the world was about to end. I had to come clean. I still smell of peanut butter. I can't even blame wine because it was midday during my feeding frenzy. And, usually, wine is to blame.

SA Takes PR

Seth Aaron Wins!  First look is Seth Aaron's, second one of my favorite looks from Mila, and last a look from Emilio. Which was all tailored jackets and vibrant colors. Seth's collection was Military-German-40s inspired. Alrighty. I thought that all three were pretty even actually. I didn't feel strongly for one over the other. The only thing that irked me was how blatant the first 10 minutes was converted into a long infomercial for LOREAL and GARNIER. Thanks, we got it. Blah. I hate when they do that...which is weird since I make a living doing stuff similar to that, but, whatevs...it's annoying when it's so in your face. Congrats SA.

It's Just Getting To Be Ridiculous

I mean ANYONE? Anyone? Is this a joke?! Someone HELP HER. I mean, look at her top even. I do not want to borrow it. She looks like she does meth every 2 minutes in this picture. HELP!

Am I Missing Something?

Why is everyone saying that Kate Hudson got a little chesty enhancement? I don't see it. I really don't. As a small-chested lady...let's face it, sometimes I can't tell if I'm coming or going-Regardless, there are some bra's out there that make me look like I actually have a pair. A somewhat cleavage inducing pair. Which, isn't easy to do. But you can. And, if you gain weight you totally look a little bustier. It's just a fact. If a plastic surgeon would like to invent a pill that only makes you gain weight in your ta's that'd be amazing. But, there is no such pill. Kate has probably gained a few and bought a push up bra. Big deal.

Well Kept Secret

I like Victoria Secret's clothes. I don't know if anyone orders their shiz, but I do. A TART tee with shoulder pads complete with sequiney epaulets is one of my favorite shirts. I've had the yoga pants from VS before. 100% cotton with the foldover band. Decent. I've bought yoga pants from everywhere. Bands too tight, too many seams, etc. (seams are unfortunate in the wrong places, it hurts sometimes, okay?) Anyway, these yoga pants at VS are insane. I'm obsessed. LYCRA and cotton, which, is the key to most good workout clothes, I get it, but, these are so good. Had to share. You can get 2 for $40 right now. Happy HAWT yoga-ing.

Gwyn N Gang

Do you guys ever read Gwyneth's blog GOOP? It's entertaining, er interesting, to say the least. Anyway, here is the whole fam in NYC yesterday (not together, mind you). I posted this pic purely for the reason that I wish I was wearing those jeans (those jeans because I actually hate most jeans, but those look amaze balls), a cozy tee and cardy. Give it to me Gwyn. Thanks.

Shhhhh!

I'm not sure who won on Project Runway last night. I will be watching ASAP. I thought I saw on WWD that Jai was a finalist, and, apparently he's not, so, what do I know?

In Honor Of Earth Day

See the styles here designer Gary Harvey showcased at the GreenShows during New York Fashion Week. Super cool.

Ever Wonder What Elton John's Real Name Is?

Me neither. But, check out the real star names below. I'll do a top ten...
10. Wynona Judd was born as...Christina Claire Ciminella (c cubed!)
9. Reese Witherspoon was born as...Laura Jeanne Reese Witherspoon (I actually like Jeanne, it's cute)
8. Natalie Portman was born as...Natalie Herschlag (I still love you Nat)
7. Miley Cyrus was born as...Destiny Hope (stripper)
6. Bo Derek was born as...Mary Cathleen Collins (Def not as sexy as Bo Derek)
5. Shania Twain is really...Eileen Regina Edwards (Thats Re-GINE-a)
4. Elton John...Reginald Kenneth Dwight (Should we call him Kenny? or Reggie?)
3. Macy Gray...Natalie Renee McIntyre (haha...that cracks me up)
2. Bono...Paul David Hewsom (I didn't think his name was Bono, but, still)
1. Portia De Rossi...Amanda Rogers (Well, how do you do, Mrs. Rogers?)

Heidi Klum

Heidi Klum at the Back-up Plan premiere. Isn't that dress the one Emilio made on Project Runway? Except long? Totally is.

Guy and Girl

Guy Ritchie and his new girlfriend. She totally resembles someone...I can't put my pointy bra on it though? Huh.

Name Change

Courtney Love changed her name. She is now Courtney Michelle. Okay. She totally should be a symbol. Her symbol would be

I Want To Be Samantha Brown

This upfront season is the first for the Travel Channel. Here are some highlights for 2010-2011:

• Bert The Conqueror Series journeys with ordinary guy, Bert Kreischer as he explores America's pastimes and thrilling activities such as the massive Cedar Point roller coasters to fishing with the locals in Tennessee.

• Best Places Ever Popular Travel Channel personalities including Samantha Brown, Adam Richman, Andrew Zimmern and more will offer their tips and advice on where to go around the world.

• Samantha Brown's Africa Travel Channel's most recognized personality is back with a new series exploring the riches of the African continent where she explores Moroccan palaces, Egyptian pharaohs' tombs to spotting wildlife on the Serengeti and tribal customs in South Africa.

• Samantha Brown's Great Hotels Samantha is in search of the best places to stay from villas in Italy to hotels with Michelin star-rated restaurants.

• Samantha Brown's Great Cruises Samantha is back in a third new series where she sails aboard the world's most luxurious cruise ships.

Samantha Brown, luckiest betch ever.

May 3rd

May 3rd. Get. It. On. Ladies.

Tiger, What Have You Done?

I don't like to talk about Tiger because I don't really care, to be honest. He's an idiot. His ignorance has went TOO FAR and this cannot be ignored. Did he get caught with another skank? Nope. Did he hit a defenseless lady on the golf course with a crazy drive? Still not it. It would be better than what I'm about to tell you. Tiger went out last night. TO A NICKELBACK CONCERT. Say what?! Tiger, this proves you are a total douche. I'm sorry. Did you get a bathroom big enough to play baseball in? (I'll have a quesadillaaaaa) Oh, barf. Nickelback, ha ha.

Back On Set

Betty Draper is back on set. What is going to happen? Will she take Don back? Oooh, I can't wait. New season starts July 25. The shows creator Matt Weiner announced Mad Men will only continue through the 2012 season. Maybe there will be a spinoff?

JJ & DK

Perfect day of shopping and eating ice cream in SoHo.

Scar Jo InStyle

I love curly hair. LOVE. Lookin Good S.

Really?

Why is everyone so shocked Sandy B isn't wearing her wedding ring? Duh. Just like people are shocked that Kate G can't dance. I refuse to talk about her.

Drinks, Probs Din Too

I like to plan this dinner party in my head with all these fantastic people. Just because. (Don't judge, I like to eat and drink) Right now I'm thinking drinks, possibly dinner with Andy Cohen. And my best friend. (I mean, Cher could come too if she wanted)  It'd be so fun. We could talk about The Real (REAL) Housewives and all things BRAVO. (Andy is an exec for the network and has the Watch What Happens Show) So, Andy, how bout it? We are super fun. Just sayin. Oh, and tivo his show, it's pretty funny. PS-Are you dying over Kelly's shoes? Totally. Deadness.

Ha Ha WHAT?!

Betty! Your weiner is hanging out! Couldn't. Resist. Weiner joke. (And Betty White)

Mrs. Bush's Book

Laura Bush has a book. Does it have any guzz? Probably not. From the look of the cover, she's not even sure what planet she's from. This picture reminds me of another dead behind the eyes lady, er, whatevs. Audrina Patridge. That's right, I put Audrina and Laura Bush in the same post. It fits here, just sayin...

UpFRONTs

If you don't work in television, you probably haven't heard of an upfront, but, The Upfront is when the channel/broadcast network/cable channel premieres their new lineup. It's usually splashy and fun, all the network 'stars' are there, and, if you work for the CW (I used to) probably Lenny Kravitz or something. He totes performed one year. I digress. Anyway, VH1's upfront is today in NYC. And, since VH1 is fine family programming, thought I'd share some highlights: (It's more than you'll ever need to know, I realize)

• You're Cut Off! - Nine spoiled young women are told they cannot go shopping and are cut off from their cash and conveniences in this "spoiled rotten rehab" series. June 14.
• Money Hungry - Ten teams comprised of two overweight pairs work to shed the weight to earn $100,000 in prize money. Summer.
• My Big Friggin Wedding - New docu-series follows five couples as they plan and execute the wildest weddings ever.
• Wedding Wars - Competition/elimination series watches as engaged couples battle against each other for a dream wedding.
• Diary of a Hip Hop Girlfriend - Eight-part docu-soap series follows four women who are each in love with a well-known rapper. Produced by Monamie Entertainment and NFG-TV.
• Eva Longoria Development Pilot: Beso: Waiting on Fame - Series about the aspiring celebrities who flock to Eva Longoria's Hollywood restaurant BESO.

• Estranged with Dr. Drew Development Pilot with Dr. Drew - In each episode, Dr. Drew works with a different couple whose relationship is in tatters.
• Dad Camp - Docu-reality series will transform six irresponsible guys into respectable dads. May.

• Football Wives - Series will focus on the spouses of professional football players. Have you been watching Basketball Wives? It's kinda awesome.
• Ocho Cinco- Cincinnati Bengals star wide receiver and current Dancing with the Stars contestant will star in his own series where he focuses on his happiness off the field. Premieres July 11.
• The T.O. Show - Season two follows Terrell Owens as he once again looks for another team in the off-season and reconnects with his kids and his ex, Kari. Premieres July 11. (I totally am into this show)

It's Probably On VH1

A new reality show is in the works tentatively called Celebrity Cheaters. It is being pitched by original Cheaters creator Bobby Goldstein which would try and "catch celebrity cheaters with their pants down." As for the skanky ho-hostesses, both Jesse James' mistress Michelle "Bombshell" McGee and Tiger Woods' Jamie Jungers have agreed to do it. Of course they have. That McGee hooker is the worst because she purposefully wrecked Sandy's Oscar high. Trash box. The thing is, people might tune in to watch this crap go down. Bottom line though: Celebs (legit celebs, not famewhores/reality stars, etc) are way too powerful/sneaky to get caught with their pants down...or wherever they put them. I don't know who they could actually catch and SHOW on TV. My guess is maybe Dustin Diamond. He'd probably consent to it...along with some other Z list stars that don't care how they'd get on TV. This show is stupid already.

Really? Huh.

Katherine Heigl chose to go to an event wearing this. Huh. Well, uh, adopt an animal. Thanks.

How Long Will This Go On...

Dear People Of The World,

Why does Lindsay Lohan have no friends? Surely she has one person in her life that is her friend. By the looks of the last few years, it seems she has zero. If you are her 'friend', you need to read the definition in the dictionary because you do not know the proper meaning of one. Chicks/Dudes who live in LA, you should totally try to be her real friend and help her. Thanks. It's too much.

That's Enough G!

Dear Gisele,

Now you are just bragging. Stop it. It's not right. Your body is RIDICULOUS.

Everyone Has A Fragrance

Why wouldn't you honestly? You can make a sh*t-ton of money from selling your scent, so, seems a no-brainer to me. Anywho, the latest star is Jennifer Aniston and this is an image for the release of Lolavie. Aniston says about her Lolavie creation that the name is of such special personal significance, she doesn't want to get into the true meaning. Okay, J. I respect that. Does it smell like tequila and cigarettes? Because that'd be awesome, and interesting...

Was out for a few days, but back now. Another gorgeous girlfriend married. Posts soon!

Say What Kellan?

It just blows my mind how many people think that because I was a model, I think I'm pretty and that I can use my looks to get ahead," Kellan tells Interview. "I'm not pretty!"

Well, actually you are. Totally hot too. If you don't want people to see you as a 'sex symbol' maybe try not to take pictures without a shirt in the shower. Just sayin. I mean, I don't mind, but, you seem to have an identity problem so...just want to help...is all...

Lucky

This is Dana Cowan. She is editor of Food & Wine Magazine. Amazing. If you had to choose, would you give up food OR wine? I know right? It depends...if it's just a week, I'd get rid of food. Stay with wine. Longer than a week, well, I'd need some cheese for sure...and bread...Well, you could just get super drunk to forget the fact that you haven't eaten too. Just a tip.

The Onion-TV Style

Comedy Central will soon serve up a new scripted series from The Onion as the network approved The Onion Sports Network (wt) to series, giving the project a 10-episode order. The Onion Sports Network, based on the hit Onion Sports Network online video series, will launch in first quarter 2011 on Comedy Central. The half-hour series will look at the array of today's sports from the teams, players, leagues, fans, to the crazy products and over-hyped coverage. -Cynopsis

Sounds cooool.

Larry Is 76

Larry King is still doing it. With his wife's sister?!! Well, rumor has it that was the reasoning for both sides filing divorce papers yesterday. I must say, what kind of sicko sleeps with her sisters husband?

B-Rits Latest Pics

Here are Britney's latest ad shots. Airbrushed, un-airbrushed. She looks good, just a little bruised. Oh, and what if you could always have someone around pinchn in here and tightening up there? Awesome.